Sunday, March 29, 2015

It's probably something I read today.

'Ah..' I thought. 'It's so noisy outside.'
Everyone's outside, I figured. Having lot's of fun and laughing loudly as they played a game.
Why am I not with them? I wondered to myself as I sit here, on the floor with my back leaned against the wall in this messy female dorm room.
I don't really understand - I should be out there in the lounge laughing along with them. But, why then am I not?
Don't get me wrong - I don't find them repelling, neither am I anti-social. In fact, I'm pretty social. So social, that I would pine for human interaction with close friends for days on end. But - I guess, thinking about it now, that's probably the reason why I'm sitting here, alone, in this room. I'm selective.
Very, selective.
I think I'm being selfish - nitpicking who I want in my life. I think it's unfair (to others) that I'm acting this way.
Then change, I hear you say. That's another thing. I don't feel like changing. I don't want to change. I'm comfortable being like this. This way, I can filter who I like, and who I don't like - who annoys me and who gets along well with me.
Is there such a thing as too much human interaction, even?
I guess so.
I don't even remember the real reason I typed out this post.
Maybe I'm just drained from today's activities.
Then again, I was baking myself in the sauna for over half an hour.

Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Singing Hungry

'Mm. It's been awhile since I stepped into the music department,' I thought to myself as I observed the supposed members of the choir whom I've never seen before. Yep. Another one of those sessions of working with people you don't know. It's strange to feel secluded in a tiny public space - especially when you are bound to get to know the people around you. Oh, one familiar face. Not that we've ever spoken, but oddly enough I've seen her around campus more times than I've ever smiled at her.
Man, these people look skillfully intimidating. Yep. Tour is going to be smashing.

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Well, it isn't so bad after all. Putting aside these feelings of awkwardness once the music starts and the voices start soaring, it's just pure magic. Learning Latin is also a plus side.

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Singing in 3 different timings is such a pain in the brain. And ear.

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Oh, and Russian.

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The best part about being alone - shamelessly having a diva of a time doing karaoke.

Musings

"It's too cold to do anything." - what I say 99% of the time.

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My digestive track needs to stop singing at the most inappropriate times.

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"Ugh, can I not?" - what I say the remaining 1% of the time.

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I can see myself owning a collection of kimono or yukata. Or just a ridiculous amount of clothes.

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Do you know how, when you like someone, and you just want to spend every waking moment with them? I've been wondering why is that and had an epiphany during dinner as I listened to the tumble dryer running opposite me.
You know how the second you're reading this word now, can never be replicated again in the future? That's just it. Every moment is different than the last - and when you want to spend those precious moments with the people you love, well, you can see why. It's a simple notion, really - one we seldom think, or reflect about. To be able to experience something together is a wonderful - almost transcendental, affair. Regardless of the moment being fleeting, or ephemeral, living that moment with another is what makes it everything.

Monday, March 23, 2015

Distractions

Have you ever just felt like your mind just can't seem to anchor itself? It's especially when you're reading something, and you've got soothing, bluesy music on 8tracks that you don't usually listen to, playing in your ears. Your eyes skim over the words - once, twice, three times; trying to make sense of the sentences arranged neatly in chunks of paragraphs but for some reason, they just seem to be words. Occasionally parts of sentences seem coherent to you, but everything else just escapes your comprehension and you end up reading them for the sake of reading them.
Then you realise that that wasn't how you wanted to read the text in the first place. You wanted to read to understand the writer, to try - at least, to grasp the emotions and the fleeting thoughts of the person typing them out and then presenting something as abstract to the public audience.
And the next thing you know, the song changes and you're once again thrown off into the world of bluesy tunes and the intention of reading to understand is lost.